"Nothing To Say"

  There was this unholy, cheating tax collector standing by himself. We have little insight to what a tax collector was and did in the days of Jesus. That sort of person is foreign to us but he was known as a low life cheater.

  While I was in Nigeria, I got first had taste of what a tax collector might be like. As we traveled from Abuja to Jos, about 100 mile journey, we came to check points with soldiers and at some, tax collectors. These men, holding rods in case anyone dare to be combative, would throw two boards filled with nails under the tires. We were stuck. They began asking for tax money to travel the road. The amount they wanted was extremely high. There would be several men surround the vehicle until the tax was paid. Threatening and waving their long rods, you would pay one way or the other. It made me realize why tax collectors were so hated by the people.

  This tax collector was standing by himself and would not lift up his eyes to heaven. As he smote his breast, he implored God to be merciful as he knew he was a sinner. This man had nothing to say for himself. There were no explanations, no denials, no excuses, no extenuating circumstances or sob stories. He had no bitter recriminations or long list of good deeds done that might be taken into consideration. When face to face with God, he had nothing to say for himself. (Luke 18:9-14)

  Here we are thinking in terms of our goodness. "We are good hearted!" or "I am a really good person!" seems to be our response at times. We speak to God as if we have goodness within and the goodness out-weighs the bad. Yet we find ourselves struggling to find life, the life of God. Sometimes our connection seems to be missing and there we stand on our goodness and life accomplishments in that goodness but the power and forgiveness evades us. When will we learn there is none righteous, not even one! We read it but do we believe it? Paul even spoke there was nothing good in his flesh (Rom. 7:18). Sin dwelt in him!

  God wants to share His life with us. Why would this holy and righteous God share anything of His eternal nature with us? Sometimes we treat forgiveness like someone buying our lunch. A simple thanks and go to the next thing. We aren't motivated by it. We will never appreciate God's gift of forgiveness through Jesus Christ much less grasp it on the level intended until we see our sin as God sees sin and that's something we can't fully do. When the impact of our sinfulness coupled with the love of God and His forgiving grace hits our hearts, we will have nothing to say for ourselves. The only words that will pass our lips: "God, be merciful to me, the sinner!"