Too many miss what it means to love. Many speak of an "unconditional" love which I agree with but to take it to the idea that someone will love you no matter what kind of person you are can be spiritually destructive.
To love someone with a godly love means that you want them better, to be better, to live better and involves discipline when needed. If loving someone doesn't bring this intended result the love shown is missing a vital ingredient. Reaching out to your children and doing everything for them or pandering to them while they live a life that is irresponsible or ungodly is not godly love at all. That is keeping them and encouraging them to continue in their sinful ways and in the end they will lose their soul! I have known parents in dealing with their grown children speak without saying a word: "I don't care about your goodness or right behavior I just want..."
If we are really concerned about loving someone as God loves (which is where the cross calls us) it should lead us into a love that is about character and godliness. When someone tells me that they love me, I hope they mean that they will correct me when I am off track, guide me when my attitude isn't godly and withhold things because I am demanding or selfish! They are looking out for my soul which shows me their love. Too many are loving with little warm fuzzies!!! Too many bail out others thinking they are showing love when in reality they are just encouraging the ungodly behavior to continue. Read the prodigal son Jesus spoke about in Luke 15 and see the Father didn't bail him out but let him go! It was the only way for him to come to his senses. It was love being shown!
God's love expects something from us. Our love for our children and the brethren should expect a right character and behavior. When we read from the Lord that "Love does not act unbecomingly" (I Cor. 13:5) why do we support those who act unbecomingly? Many call that an unconditional love but God doesn't call it that. When someone acts in ways that are demeaning, lazy and without commitment they don't need to be coddled but loved with the love and God. What does God's love call for? "For those whom the Lord loves He disciplines, and He scourges every son whom He receives." (Heb. 12:6) That is God's real "unconditional" love and we need to practice it! True love calls us upward into God.